Good morning Wild Ones,
This has been a whirlwind of a past two weeks! There was Thanksgiving, then there was sickness, and then there was self-realization. During my sickness, I was steady boxing with God. If you read my post on ‘Smiling Atop the Ruins of Your Life’, you’d know that I was sick for 4 months straight last year. Never in my life have I been that sick. And never in my life had I been so aware that I had never been that sick. Amid all of the other awful things happening, my health was the worst part of that semester for me.
After I got better, I told God that I was done being sick for the rest of my life. The devil used up all his sick days in one semester, so he was just going to have to figure out some other issue. God then gave me this dope promise, Deuteronomy 7, which I also shared in my post ‘On Boxing With God’. Verse 15 says,
“And the LORD will protect you from all sickness. He will not let you suffer from the terrible diseases you knew in Egypt, but he will inflict them on all your enemies!”
So I took this verse and ran with it.
Naturally, when I got sick over Thanksgiving, I wasn’t worried because I had that dope promise to hold on to. I went to visit my mom for this break, and she was stressed about me being sick. Then I’d give her a simple look and say ‘Remember, no Egyptian diseases mommy’.
That was until I came back and it got worse. I bawled like a full-grown baby from the pain, lost my voice, missed classes, missed tests, fought with doctors, got put on mad antibiotics, found my soul becoming heavy, and developed a resentment for God. Why? Why, when I was displaying so much faith, did I have to be in so much pain? It was unnecessary. It felt sadistic.
I was mad. I stopped praying. Stopped reading my bible.
The issue with this is that since God is such an integral part of my life, I honestly don’t know how to function without Him. Literally whenever I’m in a weird spiritual space, I automatically also find myself in a weird emotional space. And in a weird emotional space, I was!
So I decided to cleanse. No social media. No phone. Just me (and God) spending the days together, working things out, and taking myself on a date every night. And let me tell you guys, it was amazing! A bit impractical since a phone break during this busy season can’t really be a thing, but still amazing.
My dates for the week have been:
going to the Hirshhorn Museum (those are where the images in this post were taken), to a chill Afro-Caribbean lounge, an open mic in Brookland, as well as dedicating some time to self-care ( It was raining, so I got a mask, some pore strips, nail polish, and a vibe), and I ended by performing at a literally magical open mic. When I tell you, my soul was doing leaps! The amount of ridiculous talent, the amount of ridiculous love. I could have asked for no better way to end an already amazing week!
In between the dates, God and I have been on the come up.
Days into my cleanse my mom called and cussed me for being on a phone break from even her, but then she also told me exactly what I needed to hear.
She reminded me that if I was hurting, God was hurting even more. She told me about how when I called her crying, not knowing what to do, she had to hold back the tears and be strong for me. If she felt that way, how did God feel? Guys, I had a concomitant infection that started prior to my laryngitis that I did not know about. If I didn’t have so much pain in my throat, the doctor would have never noticed the other infection that I was fighting.
That’s the thing about when the bible says God’s thoughts are above our thoughts. In His wisdom, He gave me the pain to save me from an even worse illness. And by the day after I got the second diagnosis and antibiotics, I was 75% better.
This cleanse was soul-refreshing.
And I am so glad that I did it. Is your soul feeling a bit foggy? Try it out too & let me know how it goes for you!
Guys, don’t forget to share this post and follow me on my socials (@wildextremities pretty much everywhere, but all links are also in the sidebar)!
Sending mad love your way,